Sometimes, it's more obvious how selfish I am than others, even still after knowing for so long.

I'm not an only child, but the age difference between my sister and I is seven years, by a psychologist's standpoint, that's apparently like having two only children. Though, in some cases, they bond less like siblings and more like parent and child - it's not the case between my sister and I. We shared the same parents, the same fundamental ideals that came with living in the same household, but things get a bit foggy after that, despite how much I respect her as a person.

So, growing up, I got away with a lot that she didn't. I even got to blame a ridiculous amount of stuff on her, which - I guess - instilled some weird sense of entitlement in me. I got called spoiled a lot when I was younger, and often couldn't understand how things existed outside of my dome. I always put myself first - to hell with everything else. But over the years, I've consciously tried to correct myself and reset my compass. There's a POV that I'll always think in and see through, but I'm trying to consider and react with educated information, rather than jump on the Tristan train and plow through what-the-fuck-evers.

But sometimes, Braille-Reader, sometimes I apparently just have no fucks left to give and I'm back in the Tristan Show, ready for my prizes just for existing.

That's probably why I like things like karaoke and being decent at telling stories or commanding attention for a brief window. All eyes on me until I'm done with it. It used to be all the time, but recently, I've toned it down. Maybe that's getting older or maybe the effort I'm putting forward to not be a selfish dick all the time is actually paying off.